Weekdays and Weekends

When you're younger, you tend to loathe whatever day shit usually happens in. If on Wednesdays and Fridays they lock you in a room and force you to learn Maths, and you happen to hate Maths, you will naturally despise Wednesdays (but not Fridays. Nobody ever dislikes Fridays.) In fact, when you're a kid, the good days are weekends. Everything else sucks, but there's a couple of days in which you can do whatever you want to, with some luck, without anyone bugging you.

As you get older, however, you start perceiving that Life (or at least 99.9% of lives) is one long chain of suck. And you also realize not all days are created equal. No, each day has its own putrid personality and throw-up taste, like the many children of Bowser. In some particularly sucky lives, even weekends are stripped out of their good status.

So for those who still believe every day is the same, here is a round-up of a regular week as people like me see it. Keep in mind I am assuming a weekend is still a weekend. If your free day is one of the others, please read it accordingly.

-- Monday --

Origins - in English, the noun Monday comes from Old English mondaeg, meaning "day of the Moon". Several cultures seem to go by this definition. It is understood by several religions as a day for fasting: this being, not eating some things, or anything at all. Boy, Mondays in the old ages should suck even harder, huh? Boomtown Rats made public that all Mondays suck with their song I Don't Like Mondays in 1979.
Why it Sucks - why doesn't it? It's an accursed day devoted to Murphy and his gremlins. This is the day in which you go back to your bullshit life after a short period of rest. It's the beginning of the week, in which everyone is in a hurry to get somewhere or get something done. And since everyone is in a hurry, everyone takes the car to work: instant traffic jam. There are also very few students who have just a couple classes on a Monday, they're usually packed, and public transportation becomes a nightmare. People are always angry about something on Monday, even if it's just the fact they have nothing to do. Whoever you are, wherever you are, you know Monday sucks.
The Silver Lining - it only lasts for 24 hours.
How to Deal With It - if you can arrange things so that you can stay in bed all day, do so. It helps minimize damage. Get yourself a snack, turn off the cellphone and go back to bed. If you really must up and out like most of us, put on your headphones, grit your teeth, say a prayer and hang on.

-- Tuesday --

Origins - the original term, tiwesdaeg, comes from Middle English. It was named after the Norse god Tyr, the Viking god of war. In Latin, the origin is Mars' day. Apparently Tuesdays are dedicated to St John the Baptist in the Eastern Orthodox Church. For Greeks, this is as unlucky as a Monday, since Constantinople fell on a Tuesday. In Spain it's bad as well, they even have a saying about being bad to begin a journey or get married on Tuesdays.
Why it Sucks - by proxy. It's too close to Monday to be comfortable. Whatever happened on Monday and didn't get solved immediately will follow you here. For example, if you happen to get a letter on Monday about your favorite uncle dying or your car insurance being canceled, you'll have to go solve it the following day: Tuesday.
The Silver Lining - hopefully, whatever followed you here from Monday will be solved and can begin being forgotten on Tuesday, not dragging down the week.
How to Deal With It - attempt to solve whatever followed you from Monday on Tuesday! Don't let it stink up the rest of your week! If possible, have everything solved on the very Monday when it happens! Do not, under any circumstance, get married or travel. I think the Spanish are onto something.

-- Wednesday --

Origins - again, borrowed from an Anglo-Saxon God: Woden. The original was wednes dei. It also comes from Ooinsdagr of the Norse tradition, as the day dedicated to Odin. In Latin, the name comes from the god Mercury. In some religions, this is also a fasting (or starving) day. An American English idiom refers to it as "hump day", because it's situated in the middle of the week, so the work done on a Wednesday is referred to as "going over the hump". Winnie the Pooh thinks this is a day that brings bad weather: "Winds-day". It's the name of the daughter of the Addams Family for some reason I can't ascertain.
Why it Sucks - because it's "hump day". It's the middle of the week. Imagine yourself going over the top peak of a mountain of crap. That's exactly how the Wednesday is. It slows down. I can't believe a Wednesday is made of the usual 24 hours. There is some more time to it, I am sure. From here on there's only one thing on your mind: the weekend. And this day is dedicated to keeping you for as long as it can on your way there. Things don't happen on Wednesdays: they drag. Forget the hump metaphor: it's the armpit of the week!
The Silver Lining - you only have 48 hours to go by midnight for the weekend to arrive.
How to Deal With It - make coffee extra strong. Don't listen to slows, blues or ballads. Watch an action movie, run your way to the bus stop, jump in place every time you go to the bathroom. Drink a Red Bull or any sports drink. Don't let yourself be slowed down any more than needed be.

-- Thursday --

Origins - can you guess? Norse mythology at its best: Þorsdagr, the day dedicated to the god Thor. In Latin, Iovis Dies, the day dedicated to Jupiter. Douglas Adams writes in his A Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy, that the Earth is destroyed by aliens on a Thursday. According to Breakfast at Tiffany's, Thursday is gruesome. Nostradamus says the Antichrist takes Thursday as its holy day. It's looking well from here alone, huh? The only positive things I found about it were that Thanksgiving is celebrated on a Thursday and since Fridays are days with fewer classes for college students, Thursdays are good for partying, and referred to as "thirstdays".
Why it Sucks - read above. It's an evil fuckin' day. It congregates the Monday shit and the Wednesday slow in one big pile of fail. Something will happen on Thursday to screw you up on Friday or over the weekend, the dead uncle from before being a very good possibility. Picking up the hump metaphor, imagine you just crossed the peak and are headed down. Chances are that the momentum you built up on the climb will toss you down the mountain, tumbling and rolling and cursing. Right after the slow, comes the fast: everyone wants to get everything done before Friday, can't have anything to do on Friday night, get everything solved before Friday so we can ease ourselves down into the weekend! I was born on a Thursday and I'm completely convinced I will die on a Thursday. In fact, I believe life on Earth will be extinguished in one lousy Thursday right after someone says "fuck this". The good thing is, after the two-day hangover from Monday, this is the day in which you are slowly going back to your regular self.
The Silver Lining - movies are usually released on Thursdays, so you can browse what's on in case you plan on watching something the following day.
How to Deal With It - avoid problems. Especially long-lasting problems. And repeat this mantra throughout your day: "Only one day to go. Only one day to go."

-- Friday --

Origins - for the Norse, frigedaeg was the day dedicated to Frige or Freiya, gods of love. In Latin, it was consecrated to Venus. Again, some people consider Fridays to be bad, especially seafaring people, who think it's bad to be in the middle of a journey on Fridays. Still, most people only consider it unlucky if it falls on the 13th of the month. Some religions forbid the consume of meat on Fridays, so Friday is fish day. Some offices have a Casual Friday - the weekday in which workers are allowed to come to work in slacks and a t-shirt to ease off the stress of the week. Doesn't it sound so much better than Thursdays?
Why it Sucks - mostly, it doesn't. Still, you are gonna get traffic jams all the same: people wanna hurry up home from work so, once again, every bastard who owns a car brings it out to the streets. You are exhausted from the hardships of the week and completely drained, but there's still a glint of life in you, the one you're gonna take to the party or the relaxation time after dinner. If your work wasn't done by Thursday, however, this is gonna be another hurry-up day, a stress-filled day. And you also have the anticipation: you want that clock to mark six, seven, whatever your hour is for dropping everything and moving on to the weekend. A watched pot never boils, so you're gonna feel like time doesn't go. In schools, it is the day in which teachers love to send homework - something to keep students busy during the weekend, you know? Pricks.
The Silver Lining - once you leave your school or work, it's weekend.
How to Deal With It - tie up all loose ends. Calm down. Try to slide past your Friday with as much ease as possible. When the time comes to leave work or school, chill. Find a bar. Go to a party. Have a drink with the guys. Fire up the console. Stay online until 4 in the AM. Have fun.

-- Saturday --

Origins - dedicated to Saturn, saeternesdaeg. In the Catholic church, it's the day in which you pray for the dead, because it was on a Saturday that Jesus lay dead on a tomb. In the Norse culture, it was the Viking day for bathing, from the Scandinavian Lördag, "bath day". It is the second day of Jewish Shabbath, and most names derivate from that word. On Saturday morning, most channels air cartoons, so it's kid's time. Saturday Night Live is on, as well as several comedy TV shows, and unless you have something better to do, Saturday night is party night, as observed by the movie Saturday Night Fever (1977). Folklore tells us Saturdays are favored days to hunt vampires, as they're restricted to their coffins on this day, and people born on Saturdays could easily see vampires when they were otherwise invisible.
Why it Sucks - you know what I like to call Saturday? Hangover and High Roleplay Day. My party night is Friday, so I'm gonna spend most of my day in bed sick. If I can't go out, I'll be playing D&D or online for a longer period than usual, so that's good too, but I'm still gonna be sleepy all the time on a Saturday. But it's worth it, isn't it? It's your free time, and you don't wanna lose a second of it. Still, if you have nothing to do, it can be the most boring day of the week...
The Silver Lining - the week's over.
How to Deal With It - go crazy. Do everything you want. Don't let boredom take you: pick up a game, go out with the friends, watch a movie, blog, celebrate, bring down the bloody house!

-- Sunday --

Origins - oh, hard. It's the "day of the Sun", of course. Many cultures understand Sunday as the first day of the week rather than the last, I don't like that, I'd rather have my weekend paired up. It's the day of sports events, big and colored comic strips on the newspaper and special dishes on many restaurants.
Why it Sucks - again: by proxy. Anything that is close to a Monday gets spoiled, you notice? Sunday is a sad day... it's your last day of rest before some more bullshit. And if you're a Saturday Night person, you're a Hungover Sunday one too.
The Silver Lining - still 24 hours to do whatever the fuck you want to do...
How to Deal With It - enjoy it to the max. Don't let yourself say the words "Shit, tomorrow I have to go back to work".